The Lord lives! Praise to my Rock!Psalm 18:46-49
May the God of my salvation be exalted!
He is [El Nekamoth];
he subdues the nations under me
and rescues me from my enemies.
You hold me safe beyond the reach of my enemies;
you save me from violent opponents.
For this, O Lord, I will praise you among the nations;
I will sing praises to your name.
El Nekamoth: God Who Avenges Me (God Who Pays Back Those Who Harm Me)
This might be the characteristic of God that scares me the most – but unlike most fears, it scares me to Him, not away from Him.
Our immediate reaction when we think of payback for those who harm us is just gloating, is it not? “HaHA! Finally they’re gettin’ theirs! Take THAT!” Isn’t that the victory cry of the wronged who have been defended?
But it doesn’t take long for a nagging voice in the back of my head to start bringing things up… does He not defend them, too? The people I have wronged – is He not their just Defender? Will He not pay me back justly, as He has paid them back?
This is when my flight instinct rears. I cannot overpower Him, so I must run – but where? To the only One Who can keep me safe from Him –
His mercy is my only hope against His vengeance. His perfect sacrifice the only stand-in that can absorb the fullness of His wrath for what I’ve done. El Nekamoth must also be Elohim Chaseddi, or I and everyone are finished.
And I need both of them – both the God of Vengeance and the God of Mercy – because where I have been the victim, I know El Nekamoth is right, and where I have been the sinner, I know Elohim Chaseddi is necessary.
So yes, I fear El Nekamoth. I fear Him enough to flee to Him. Where else can I go?